Random Thoughts

Why do people get mad at you then not tell you why they are mad? It drives me crazy. I am not a perfect person nor will I ever be one. I generally don't intent to upset anyone, but sometimes it does happen. Now this person is going to be mad at me and not tell me why, worse they are going to be hidden mad and take it out on me in other ways. Just tell me what I did wrong, I promise I will fix it or at least feel really bad about it. If you don't tell me there is a problem I will not know there is a problem. I am as perspective as a brick wall, and just about as fast as one too. More importantly if I don't know something is making you mad, I will do it again. I say if you don't tell me the first time I did it made you mad, then you don't get to be mad the second time.

A Conversation With God

Me: I hate you. God: Why? Me: Everything is your fault, everything is your plan. So it is all your fault. God: If it is my plan then it is happening as I want it too, you just don't understand. Me: Then explain it to me. Why do people die young? Why is there war? Why is there cancer? Why do babies die? Why do you let this horrible things happen? God: I could answer all of those questions, but I know that is not really what is bothering you. You are only truly worried about yourself. You only want to know why you don't get what you want. Me: You took everything from me, and I am suppose to just expect that. Why does everything have to be your plan. Why can't my plans be important too. What about what I want. What about the house and car I want. The family I had planned, the job I needed. What about my happiness? You left me to fight for myself and I did. I continue to fight everyday for what I want, but all you do is say no that is not my plan. Why should I care about your plan if it doesn't include what I want. Why should I let you guide me when I can do it by myself. God: I can grant you eternal salvation. You will live in paradise forever if you just follow me. Me: And if I don't I have to go to Hell. That is no choice you wave your hand and cast me away for having my own ideas about my life. That hardly seems fair. I hang on to my anger and never seem able to forgive. Is that part of your plan, me being so damn stubborn. Is that what you want for me. God: I want everyone of my children to come back to me. I cry forever lost soul, but that is the price I pay for granted you free will. I want no followers who don't believe. I force no one to follow me, it is your choice. Me:...... God: I made you the way you are so that you can grow. If you had not gone thru everything you had in your life you would not be who you are. For every thing you have gone thru has made you a stronger and better person. You can learn to forgive, and let go of your anger you just have to ask. You did become who you are overnight, and you will not change overnight. I could take it all from you in a moment, but then you would no longer be you. I made you this way for a reason and you are still a part of my plan. Me: I have never asked for anything from anyone that is the hardest thing to do. My sinful pride will not let me. God: You say yourself it is your sinful pride. I have always been there just waiting for you to ask. I will grant you these things, and the entire kingdom of heaven. Just let me help you. Let go of everything and let me guide you. I will show you the way. Me: God please forgive me for I am full of sin. You know my daily struggles and can truly see my heart. Help me to forgive and accept your wisdom. It has taken me 30 years of fighting but I see now that I can't do this by myself. I have denied you at every turn so sure that my way was better. I now that you where only trying to show me the path. Help me to let go of my anger and to grow as a person, but more importantly as a Christian. I accept now that everything I have now in my life is because of you. Help me to use everything I have to be the person you know I can be. But most of all help me to be humble and let you guide my path.

God’s Creation

By Cassandra Brown

English

Drifting back a single place stands out in the writer’s memory. Using the five senses, sight, taste, smell, sound, and touch Niagara falls, Ontario, Canada can be described. Also the sight of the rolling water and the sound of the surrounding activities a person may experience are going to be explored. The taste of the salty mist and the sense of being a small dot on the map are given in detail. Niagara Falls is an amazing sight that indulges all the senses, because it is something only the hand of god could create.

The rolling water comes down the river like a freight train ending with the wonderful sight a woman stands gazing at in wonder. Standing there not knowing how this amazing wonder even began.  Did it begin as a small stream or has it always been this massive hole of wonder. The twinkle of light that fall upon the strip at night look as though the night sky as fell to the ground. On occasion some will see the rainbow of lights that fall upon the Horseshoe Falls.

Distracting a sight seer the sounds of the strip filter out over the sound of the falls. The small carnival gives off the familiar sound of children’s laughter.   The grinding sound of the fairest wheel grinding to a haul as lover exit hand in hand, tenderness in their hesitant giggles fills the night air.   The overwhelming sound of the tourists muddling about, showing that the Falls are something that is share between families, friends and strangers.

The salty smell enters the nose as the new explorer crosses the rainbow bridge into paradise. While walking along the strip the days of old fasion caramel popcorn and taffy drift to one’s nose.  While a tour on the double decker bus brings smells of sunscreen and the woman that left the hotel with a little too much perfume are burned into the memory. Flowers paint the causeways like a Picasso painting, filling the air with sweet smells of a backyard gardens.

While your senses are now almost filling to the brim, stepping back in aw, the viewer realizes what a small speck in a vast world. Taking the time to slow down is sometimes hard to find. The peace founded next to the Falls is like the first night a new born sleeps through the night. It takes a life time to find absolute peace and a moment to lose it.  So a true seeker cherishes every moment in God’s wonder.

Him

By: Cassandra Brown

English

                Is he a friend, a lover, a savior? This man fall into all of these categories.  In great detail I will describe how this wonder human being pulled me from the depths of despair to comfort me. Also I will explain the new formed connection we have that makes us one. I was lost and he saved me, because of this I am the person I am this moment in time.

                Smack, rock bottom this girl hit it hard like a ton of bricks. Then out of nowhere a friend of many years reached out a life line. He put himself in the middle of violence and pain to give a lost soul salvation. He pulled me in giving me strength to stand on my own.   To stand up for the things in life that is right. He has always been there in front of me, but I was blinded by temptation.

                Love, passion, and partnership are all a part of my life thanks to this saving grace.  I am free as a bird to live and become what God intended for me.  A smile something so unfamiliar is now a part of my daily wardrobe. He tells me am beautiful and smart. He says I can do anything in this world. At the end of the day I can’t wait to fall asleep wrapped in his arms. All those years behind the eyes of a friend were the love of my life.

                I was lead off the path of happiness to be hurt and defeated, think that no one could love me. If I would have just stopped for one moment and looked into the eyes of a friend I would have found what I was missing. He was there when others were not and he comforted me when I was beaten and bruised. Now I cherish every moment I spend gazing into his eyes and being wrapped in his arms, because I know someone finally looking back.